Post by Steve Sinclair on Feb 24, 2014 22:43:38 GMT
Sunday morning and Billy is slowly starting to open his eyes. The sunlight is poking through the lone window in studio apartment and is naturally hitting him in the face.
As he stirs he moans and groans not from the pain from his brutal match with Emma and Archer, but from a all night drinking binge. He may have overdone it this time.
He kicks his legs off the side of the bed and slowly sits up. The blanket slowly falls off his chest and shoulder and we can see some welts still on his back from the match. His hair is mess, all over the place. He glances down at the floor and something catches his eyes. He slowly leans forward, his back tightens up as he reaches for it, after fumbling with it a couple of time he finally picks up what caught his eye. Bring it up to his face so he can see it better as he has in his hand a red lacy pair of panties. He holds the pair between his two index fingers and lucky, their not a mile a wide. Billy slowly turns his body around to see if anyone is in bed with him.
All he sees is jet black hair poking out from the ball of blankets and one foot sticking out at the bottom of the ball.
"huh?" Billy says scans his bed mate. The hair seems to be long and straight and the foot is pretty feminine. As to who it is, Billy doesn't have a clue. That's when he notices he's naked too.
He balls the panties in his hand and rubs his forehead and runs his hands through the rat nest that is his hair. He takes a deep breath and slowly stands up. He drops the balled up panties on the bed and starts to stomp around the bottom the of the bed like a Neanderthal towards the bathroom. If he even tried to be lite on his feet, it wouldn't happen. Those first, just woke up from a drunken adventure steps might as well come with shoes made from lead.
Couple of minutes later, the shower is running........
"This was the GREATEST! And ima means GREATEST WEEKEND EVER!!!! HELL YEAH! DALE EARNHARTD JR JUST WON THE DAYTONA 500!!!!! Yeah! You heard me correctly America! DALE JR!! DAYTONA! 500! WINNER!"
Guess who sobered up watching a 6 hour rain delay only to get drunk again around 11 at night when the number 88 crossed the finish line first. Oh you might be thinking Billy was sober? For a NASCAR race? But he was. He was hitting the water big time on Sunday to flush his liver out and not feel so hung over. He's a drunk who cares about his over all health but when Dale JR won after the longest Daytona 500 ever, his liver stood no chance. Ah okay. He only had a couple of sips of shine but still, Sunday was no shine day.
Billy is out in the barn where his still is, where he is mixing his next run of mash and watching a replay of the race on his phone. He's decked out in Dale JR stuff and has his phone in his hand on NASCAR.com to get a Dale JR Daytona 500 winner hat.....as soon as they come out.
"First! We defended our titles once again against Bad Intentions and we put dis to rest! Who is da best team in the UWL? Huh? Answer that questions Emma! Why clearly, clearly its us, the Tag Team Champions! Dats who! Yeah okay, whatever. You wons that round robin match and I'll be the first to admit. Not bad. Not bad at all. But the next night whens yous had just one match....wait I've been learnin' some Spanish. When yous had uno match, huh match dat had sumthin' real important on da line, you were no match fer the Tag, Team, Champions!"
Billy is sporting a huge smile. A smile a country wide.
"Then! After like what felt like ferever just sittin' around and waitin' on the blasted rain to move on out, we gots the Daytona 500 under the lights! And the best damn driver in NASCAR, Dale JR won his second Daytona 500! Praise Jesus!"
Billy slaps his hands together and holds them out and looks up at the heavens.
"Thank you baby Jesus for makin' dis like, da best weekend ever! I won, Dale won, and Heather won!"
Heather being his bed mate from the other night. When she finally woke up, Billy learned she was stone cold sober the whole time. Not a ounce of shine or beer pasted through her lips. She's a 19 year old Preacher's daughter. Some how during the party, Billy might have asked her to marry him.........she said yes. Guess who can't wear white on her wedding day as a result.
"Heather June Thomas! The future Mrs. NASCAR Billy!"
You'll never guess what month she was born in.
"Yup! Sorry ladies but dis guy! Is no longer on da market! I've be spoken fer!"
He says this, but he still doesn't believe this.
"And I couldn't be happier!"
All lies.
"I've still gots me my title! A real purty lady on my arm and soon, real soon, a new JR hat! And Shirt! Beltbuckle if they have one. Signed picture! Hell Ima gunna go all out on dis. I ain't gunna lie. Ima buying everything they put out for his second Daytona win. Hell yeah!"
Billy checks his phone again and here it is, 1 in the morning and NASCAR.com still hasn't uploaded anything new for JR's big win.
"But today is a new day ya'll, and while Ima about to get another run of shine ready I have to start thinkin' about my next match. You see this week I get some dude in a mask. The Great Mannquini. Mister brand spanking new UWL Television champion. Now our paths have never crossed before and while you have a new title around yer waist, you will be steppin' into dat ring against someone who has been a champion since October. Ima best of the best, ain't no doubt about it. I don't understand how you can call yerself great when you just won yerself a title. I should be callin' myself the Great NASCAR Billy cuz when you hold onto gold as long as I am, then yer great. Ima on a roll. Ima dominating the tag division. I've started winnin' in singles matches and now dat I've gots you across da ring from me....."
Billy rubs his hands together.
"And Ima seein' dat new sparkly new title around yer waist, Ima thinkin' that if I beat ya, then I should be like, the number one guy to get a shot at yer title. I ain't gunna lie, I would love to have another title around my waist. If Joe can do it with the Heritage and Tag Team title, then der is no reason why I couldn't pick me up another title and be a dual champion too. How awesome would dat be? I can see the pay checks now. I can see the ladies now.....you know if I wasn't engaged and stuff."
It's amazing how quickly that escaped his mind.
"You better be ready Mannquini. As a champion like myself, everyone is gunna be gunnin' fer you. Yous gunna have a huge ass cardboard bullseye from Alco on yer back and it ain't gunna go away till someone reaches up and snatches that new title away from ya. And that someone is gunna be me, NASCAR Billy! Ima riding high! JR won! I won! JR is a 2 time Daytona winner and if everything goes well, I be settin' myself up to be a two time UWL Champion as well! Ima gunna take a spring rubber out in the front, two rounds in the rear and use the slingslot on ya to...."
Billy smacks his hands together real hard.
"get ya with the bump and go and boom....NASCAR Billy is the winner. What's dat they say. Winner winner Chicken dinner? Boy it better be fried chicken! I can eat some chicken dinner like no one else. Dis is my chance to make a real impact in the UWL and it starts with you Mannquini. Don't feel sorry fer self Mannquini. Not everyone can be like JR heading through the tri oval at 200 miles per hour. Ima JR and your the rest of the field, smashing and cashin' and goin' up in flames behind me, because if you ain't first, like me, than you just suck!"
Billy glances at his phone and NASCAR just updated their shop with new Daytona stuff.
"whoooooo nice. I want dat hat and I want it now!"
Billy turns and heads back into the barn as the scene fades to black.