Post by Steve Sinclair on Apr 9, 2014 22:10:16 GMT
It's a nice bright sunny spring morning out in the field where the camper that Billy calls home is. The door to the camper swings open and standing in the door in some board shorts is NASCAR Billy. No Dale JR stuff on today after the fiery crash Monday at Texas. It's white board shorts and his trusty pair of cowboy boots. He slowly steps down out of the camper and over to where his chair is in front of the fire pit. He reaches down and picks up his can of Skoal winter green. But first he pauses. He looks to the left.
He looks to the right.
He looks under the chair.
He looks back to the camper.
"Well Is don't sees her." Billy says in reference to his new tag team partner Emma. One of the golden rules is no chew around Emma!
He taps the top of the can and pops open the can and takes a pinch out He pulls out his bottom lip and stuffs his lip after he snaps the top back on the can. He drops the can on to the stump next to his chair and wipes the excess chew off his fingers.
"uhmmm. Oh yeah dat hit da spot. I needed dat. A little pick me up after a hard fought match with Even. A match dat I should have had. A match dat I almost had. Next time thou, when I face off against Even again, da outcome will be different. I promise you dat. Next time, Ima taking dat TV title too. But first I have to talk about my new tag team partner. Da person who teamed up with me to defend da Tag Team titles against......well I'll get to dat in a minute."
Also on the stump is Billy's spit bottle. He picks it up and spits in the bottle.
"Now Ima sure some of ya were surprised when I asked Emma to be my tag team partner after everything we have been through. I've lost count of how many times Emma slammed me on a chair, through a table or tried to hurt me but I know dis. With Joe gettin' his leg broken in two I needed a tough sonofabitch to take his spot. I needed someone who is quick on der feet. Someone who is ring savoy. Someone who doesn't quit no matter what da odds might be. I don't see Pine Baron and Kahzir as a bunch of push overs. Dey are as tough as dey come and we're in for a good old fashion knock out brawl when and if we meet in da ring for those titles and I need someone in my corner who is as tough as nails."
Billy shakes his head.
"And der is no way in hell dat I was teaming up with Steve Sinclair. When I look around da UWL der is only a couple of guys who foot da bill to be my partner but I dunno if I could trust dem. I mean really trust em. Emma and I, we have had our issues but at da end of da day I know how much she respects da titles. She busted her ass 3 times to beat me fer da titles. She wanted them more than anything in UWL and was willing to go to da edge of the world and back to get em. Dat's what I respect about her. I knows teaming up with her is the right choice. On her own she has been opening eyes because she is one tough chick and anyone who can hold a victory over Justin Brooks is okay in my book."
Billy pauses and spits in his bottle.
"Now Ima sure dis wasn't da way she wanted to get her hands on da tag straps. I mean who would? But when we hit dat ring fer da first time and to defend those titles, Ima confidant dat da fire she had in her dat pushed her to win those titles, will take over and burn inside of her to keep dat title now dat she has it around her waist. If I was her, I would want to show everyone in da UWL dat I can step up and fill Joe's shoes as da tag champion. You know, if you really look at dis."
Billy spits again.
"When we defend da titles against Pine Baron and Kahzir or against Rabid Angle, we might be defending da titles but really we will be out der fighting fer da tiles fer da first time. We have to prove to everyone just why we are da UWL Tag Team Champions. And I have faith in us. No doubt, no doubt."
Billy sets his spit bottle down and digs the chew out of his lip and flicks it away.
"And speaking of Pine Baron and Kahzir. You can't call yerself da number one contenders to da tag titles when you two are loosing tag matches and now we have a conundrum."
Billy flashes a quick smile, either over Pine Baron and Kahzir loosing the match or the use of big words like confidant and conundrum.
"Just who is da number one contenders to da tag titles? Ima not sure now. Is it Pine Baron? Or is Eddie Jones? Is it Kahzir or is it Stephen Callaway? Ima not sure. Maybe we should have some sort of match to decide dis once and fer all? Like a number one contender match! I mean if you're gunna stand in da ring Pine Baron and bitch about da tag team titles den as the tag team champion I needs to know who da number one team is who will challenge us. I mean, it's only fair. Dunno think?"
Billy steps to in front of the chair and takes a seat.
"So dis week I get to face da first female of da UWL. I get da pleasure of facing off against Autumn Raven. Now, I ain't lying here. I still feel funny about facing da girls in da ring in a match but when Emma was kicking da crap out of me, I didn't have a choice but to fight back you know. Ima getting used to it slowly but man, dis week. Dis week is gunna be rough because let's face it. Autumn....is kinda hot. Ima not sure if anyone has ever said dat to you or not Autumn but.......I heard a song da other day. The channel on the radio some how ended up on of dem hip hop channels. Da song was if you like it, put a ring on it. Something like dat. When ever I see you Autumn, I likes what I see and I would put a ring on it."
Billy covers his face almost embarrassed that he just said that.
"Oh lordly Ima sorry. I shouldn't have said dat. You are more den a purty face. Dis is a match dat I need to win. A win over you would give me a boost in des single matches. Ima da king of tag matches, being undefeated and all but Ima not so good on my own and if I could pin Autumn Raven down to da mat fer da victory, it would have me going up a rung on da ladder! And I need dat if I plan on beatin' Even Caravelle fer dat TV title. But let's be honest here."
Billy stands up.
"With a body and a face like you have Autumn. It makes it real hard to hit ya and rough ya up. Unless of course you're into dat sort of thing. Ima a professional so I will do what I have to to win dis match. I just won't like it one bit. I'll tell ya what Autumn. Win or lose. How about I take you out to dinner after da match? You know, so der is no hard feelings after words."
Billy pauses like he waiting on a answer or something.
"Maybe? Well we'll see. Till next time. Dis is your favorite tag team champion, da best damn shiner in des parts and da biggest Dale JR fan dis side of da Mississippi you will ever meet, even if he has sucked in da last 2 races saying, Ima sorry to Autumn fer beating ya dis week, Hello to Emma, my new tag team partner. Get well soon Joe, and Fuck off Steve fer I am NASCAR Billy! And if you ain't first!"
Billy stands up.
"Den you suck!"
Fade out.