Post by Steve Sinclair on Mar 9, 2015 18:52:38 GMT
Dat is what I’m talkin’ ‘bout!
Back in Tennessee…..
Inside NASCAR Billy’s race shop…...
The big block car is out of the hauler and to make room in the shop today the hauler is parked outside but the drag car is back in the shop tucked into the one corner of the shop up on stands. The hood to the dirt car is on the floor in front of the car and Billy’s tool box has been pushed up to the car. Standing next to it is NASCAR Billy. He sets a can of Skoal on the side shelf on his box and next to the can of Skoal is a mason jar. Billy adjusts his camo bass pro hat by tipping the brim upwards to the sky.
"Yay! The streak has ended! The streak has come to an end! Old NASCAR Billy got back in the win column dis week by beating who was never beaten before and make no bones about, for sho it was a bonafide victory for me. Saturday night was a good night. All around it was a good night.
First. Like I said I defeated Sakito and by the looks of it we won’t be see him fer a while. Now I ain’t gunna take credit fer dat and if he never returns then we all know how his last match went down in the UWL. Going down at the hands of me. Just when everyone was thinkin’ I was a joke. A washed up shine drinkin’ bum, I pull off a big win like dat. Some might call dat a upset….”
The Jackman walks into the picture and stands over Billy’s left shoulder. He crosses his arms.
"But not me! Da losin’ streak might had me question myself but like Nanook said…..Going solo ain’t easy. Der are gunna be some bumps in da road and I have been takin’ my lumps for sure. In fact I have a theory about dis. More on dat in a bit.”
The Jackman slowly shakes his head, even though he is wearing a helmet you can tell he was rolling his eyes.
"Next from Saturday night.”
Billy smirks. He rubs his hands together, glances at his jar of shine and strokes his beard. He slowly starts to unscrew the lid on the mason jar.
"The Rodent.”
Billy takes the lid and sets it down on the shelf next to the jar and picks up the jar.
"Now…..I’m being honest here. It took me Saturday night, Sunday morning. Sunday afternoon and into Sunday night for me to calm down what you were gunna do to Jessica. My blood pressure….whoooo man.”
The Jackman motions with his thumb that it was through the roof. Billy looks up at the heavens.
"Jesus. Sorry for my language at times using your name in vain but dat guy, dat Rodent, seein’ him with dat chain around Jessica’s neck…..all I saw was red. I wanted a piece of him and while I didn’t get all of em as I wanted too, I got some licks in. I think I sent a message to The Rodent loud and clear. And it wasn’t till Sunday night at da track until I got the news I have been waitin’ fer. Nanook sent me a text sayin’ dat I gots my match at Honor and Glory against you Rodent! If you thought losin’ to Joe Hager was bad enough. If you thought the beatin’ Justin Brooks is gunna give you this week is gunna be rough. You haven’t seen anything yet! Boy….you are in fer one hell of a beatin! I can’t wait for Honor and Glory. I will be the pied piper leading the trash that is you out of the UWL. You will regret you ever placed your hands on Jessica.”
Billy takes a sip of his shine.
"Dis I promise.”
As Billy takes another sip The jackman slams his fist into his open palm.
"So Sunday night before I got the news about my match...I was at the track, out in front leading the race. Fifty lapper, Five G to win and then smoked started to pour out da header and I had all sorts of lights blowin’ up on dash board and I blew da motor up and I didn’t win. Dat was the low point of my weekend. A big old DNF next to my name. So here I am gettin’ ready to swap out da big block and get ready for Friday night and while I’m unhooking stuff, unboltin’ the motor I got thinkin.”
Billy sets the jar down and picks up his can of chew.
"My theory I came up with I was tellin’ ya about. It seems like da UWL has been lining me up against some of the best in da UWL. I mean just look at who I have been booked against here lately. Since the beginning of da year I have faced the following in single matches. Autumn Raven. Josh Eagles, Jason Michaels, Lt. Bowers. Ray Harlan, Josh Eagles again. Cory Chevelle and last week Sakito Ishihara. And now dis week I’m booked to face Chris Nichols. Now I know I’m Two, five and one in all of those matches and fer Chris Nichols he’s probably only seeing dis match has nothing more den a warm up for him as he is set to go up against Caleb Hart and Lt. Bowers. But from where I stand…”
Billy opens the can of chew and takes a pinch and stuffs his bottom lip.
"The UWL, Jay Jefferson and all of those guys in suits dat sit around a big old table are just testin’ me. Yeah. Testin’ me to see if I can be the one guy in the UWL who can beat Caleb Hart fer da Triple Crown Championship!”
The Jackman buries his face in his hand and shakes his head. Even he doesn’t buy it.
"How else can you explain dis? I’m facin’ a guy who is in line for another shot at the title again. Dey must not have any faith in him by now. He can’t get da job done. I bet dey are ready to move along now. Find someone else to challange Caleb and…..I don’t want to toot my horn too much but have you seen the merch sales lately? Der is Caleb Hart at the top of the list and right behind him, on his heels is…..me!”
The Jackman bobs his head and agrees.
"Who is as popular in the UWL not named Caleb Hart? Why it’s me! Listen to the reaction I get when I walk out to dat ring! I am one with the people! I am who dey come to see! I have been thinkin’ of this current run dat I am on all wrong. All of these losses, it’s a message from Jay and everyone else dat I need a bit of fine tuning. Dey are pushing me. Wanting me to get better. Wanting me to be dis finely tuned wrassling machine! Yeah! I am being prepped fer a shot at Caleb Hart and da UWL Triple Crown Championships. Can you imagine the ticket sales from dat match! Caleb Hart. versus. Nascar Billy! Oh my god would people go out of their minds! The buy rates would be insane!”
The Jackman sighs. The first verbal sound he has ever made. Billy hears it and turns towards him.
"No! Really! I think dis is the long term plan fer me set up by the UWL and I just figured it out. Why else would dey booking me against guy who get to face Hart all of da time. It’s clear dat none of em are as good as Caleb and it’s part of der job to find someone in the UWL who is going to push Caleb to the limit. I’m dat guy.”
The Jackman shakes his head several times and walks off.
"Go ahead and think I’m nuts. But dis is da truth! And as soon as I am done with the Rodent….when I beat the snot out of him. I will show everyone dat this idea I have, dis theory of mine is true! In fact Ima not even gunna wait till Honor and Glory to start revealin’ Jay’s master plan. Dis week I’m going to shock da world once again when I beat Chris Nichols! Jay. Buddy. I hear ya! I see what you want and I’m goin’ to deliver. Chris Nichols isn’t da guy who is going to beat Caleb Hart….I am and dis week. I’ll show ya once and for all dat when it comes to the next UWL Triple Crown Champion, it ain’t Chris Nichols.”
Billy points at himself.
"It’s me!”
Fade out.
