Post by Steve Sinclair on Feb 26, 2016 23:32:51 GMT
Scene opens up inside of the Bad Ass Casino, namely his suite on a Friday afternoon and we hear giggling from not one but two female voices from inside the bathroom. The door is shut so we have no idea what is going on in there and after a couple of seconds the door opens up and walking out with a towel wrapped around his waist is the Bad Ass One, James Kelloggs. He is all smiles and looks more than refreshed as struts out of the bathroom.
”Oh….Hello there. I didn’t hear you come in, I was...busy.” He says as coming out of the bathroom wearing nothing but a towel wrapped around them are two stunning blondes and they are dripping wet. One of the blondes slaps him on the behind and giggles as they tiptoe away into the other room. James smiles and cocks his head to the side and gives her the look. He wags his finger towards her.
”I’ll remember that! So I’m guessing you’re here because in less than 24 hours, the Bad Ass One will defend his Prestigious Prestige World Championship against the most lowest denominator in Tyler Raptor yeah?” James says as he begins to walks into the other room himself where sitting on a mahogany stand is the UWL Prestige title. James stands next to it and rests his arm on the stand as it’s built around his height. Everything in the room is. In the background out on the balcony are his two girls, sipping wine and chatting while still only wearing towels.
”This right here folks is the title the Bad Ass One is going to put on the map. This right here folks is the belt that the Bad Ass One will make to be the most coveted title in the UWL. Forget the Triple Crown. The hell with the TV title and do the tag belts even exists with this in the stable of championships to be had in the UWL? A couple of months from now, people, guys, gals, the Bruce Jenner's of the world will be lining up on the UWL front door step banging on the glass doors driving Gary Young and Jay Jefferson mad as they will all want a shot at this, and they will want a shot at this because in doing so they will get what they truly desire.”[/font]
Kelloggs flashes a smile.
”A piece of the Bad Ass James Kelloggs! Yeah all of you bitches, you want to dip your hands in my golden nuts and honey! You yearn for my breakfast, a breakfast fit for a king, the breakfast of…..what was that?”
James cups his ear.
”Yeah that’s it you bitches. The breakfast of champions because that is what I am, that is what I was born to be, what I trained to be. When I was born, Jesus appeared before my mother and touched her forehead and blessed her and said unto her. “Mary you are blessed because you have just gave life to the single most important person in the history of the world. You have birthed a true leader, a world class champion for he is the Bad Ass One!” True story bitches! Phucking Jesus proclaimed me to be the best of the best, the real G.O.A.T. in the history of mankind! Phuck Billy Danielson, I am the greatest of all time and the prophecy has come true because look! Fixate your eyes here! Gaze into the wonder that is….the….”
Even the Bad Ass One looks at the belt.
”Prestigious! Prestige World Championship. You can’t pull your eyes away from it, you can’t get it out of your mind, you want it, you have a sudden urge to want it! You have to have it! You NEED IT! But there is where the problem lies. To get this, to get this around your waist, to have your name right here.”
James points to the nameplate, the nameplate that reads James Kelloggs.
”You have to do something so impossible, so demanding that Tom Cruise and Albert Einstein combined! Wouldn’t be able to solve this problem and that is, defeat me for this belt. You can look to the skies for answers! Pick up the good book and read it cover to cover, frontwards and backwards twice and you still won’t find the answers. Go to confession and lay your sins out on a table and say 1900 hail mary’s!”
Kelloggs shakes his head no….
”You wouldn’t find the answers. You can’t find the strength. Superman can’t help you for he is powerless and once you step inside those ropes and see me, your life as you know is over with, you are the sheep lead to slaughter for there is no way and I mean NO WAY you can ever defeat the Bad Ass One! To figure it out, to solve the puzzle, it will drive you mad! COMPLETELY MAD! Just look at my opponent this week. Tyler Raptor.”
James motions that he is crazy.
”He thought so hard, the gears in his tiny little head were running so fast that he snapped and suddenly he thought he was standing up for me! He was going to save me. Can you get a load of that guy? He was going to take this belt right here and fight against the injustices of the world, the injustices that have been inflicted on me…..buddy. Pal. Take a look around! I’m doing just fine. I’m doing…”
James looks out to the balcony and his two guest for the night, they are starting to make out with each other. He nods and smirks.
”Just fine for myself. I especially don’t need some asshat like yourself standing up for me. I more than stand on my own two feet. Just to quote another white guy here for a second, “If there is a problem, yo, I’ll solve it.” and you Raptor will join all of the dinosaurs on “Ice ice baby” disappearing with Ron Hamilton into the land of the lost, the land of the forgotten, the land of the never was going to happen. The land of misfit toys for all I care. The odds of you beating me tomorrow night are nil at best, those are your odds on a good day, with the wind at your back and the sun in my eyes. There is a reason why I am the champ, the only damn champ that matters in the UWL and it’s because I’m just that damn good. I’m….golden!”
Kelloggs runs his hand over the face of the title, like he’s rubbing your face in it that he has the belt and you don’t. Little bastard….
”And there isn’t a damn thing that is ever going to change that! For once and for all, tomorrow night at Only the Strong Survive, I! The Bad Ass James Kelloggs, will kick some ass, will cash a big fat ass check and…..and will get some ass on top of all of that and Tyler, that is a whole lotta of ass going on tomorrow night and it will happen because I am the Bad Ass James Kelloggs. Champion of Champions. Your beloved, worshipped and idolized Prestigious Prestige World Champion! And that kiddies, you can take to the bank because here in Vegas, the house always win.”
Out on the balcony, it’s getting pretty heated out there. The towels are on the ground now.
”Now if you excuse me. There is some….winning...going on out there that I need to join so you can see yourself out bitch!”
James Kelloggs turns and starts to make his way towards the balcony and he loses his towel in the process…….
”Oh….Hello there. I didn’t hear you come in, I was...busy.” He says as coming out of the bathroom wearing nothing but a towel wrapped around them are two stunning blondes and they are dripping wet. One of the blondes slaps him on the behind and giggles as they tiptoe away into the other room. James smiles and cocks his head to the side and gives her the look. He wags his finger towards her.
”I’ll remember that! So I’m guessing you’re here because in less than 24 hours, the Bad Ass One will defend his Prestigious Prestige World Championship against the most lowest denominator in Tyler Raptor yeah?” James says as he begins to walks into the other room himself where sitting on a mahogany stand is the UWL Prestige title. James stands next to it and rests his arm on the stand as it’s built around his height. Everything in the room is. In the background out on the balcony are his two girls, sipping wine and chatting while still only wearing towels.
”This right here folks is the title the Bad Ass One is going to put on the map. This right here folks is the belt that the Bad Ass One will make to be the most coveted title in the UWL. Forget the Triple Crown. The hell with the TV title and do the tag belts even exists with this in the stable of championships to be had in the UWL? A couple of months from now, people, guys, gals, the Bruce Jenner's of the world will be lining up on the UWL front door step banging on the glass doors driving Gary Young and Jay Jefferson mad as they will all want a shot at this, and they will want a shot at this because in doing so they will get what they truly desire.”[/font]
Kelloggs flashes a smile.
”A piece of the Bad Ass James Kelloggs! Yeah all of you bitches, you want to dip your hands in my golden nuts and honey! You yearn for my breakfast, a breakfast fit for a king, the breakfast of…..what was that?”
James cups his ear.
”Yeah that’s it you bitches. The breakfast of champions because that is what I am, that is what I was born to be, what I trained to be. When I was born, Jesus appeared before my mother and touched her forehead and blessed her and said unto her. “Mary you are blessed because you have just gave life to the single most important person in the history of the world. You have birthed a true leader, a world class champion for he is the Bad Ass One!” True story bitches! Phucking Jesus proclaimed me to be the best of the best, the real G.O.A.T. in the history of mankind! Phuck Billy Danielson, I am the greatest of all time and the prophecy has come true because look! Fixate your eyes here! Gaze into the wonder that is….the….”
Even the Bad Ass One looks at the belt.
”Prestigious! Prestige World Championship. You can’t pull your eyes away from it, you can’t get it out of your mind, you want it, you have a sudden urge to want it! You have to have it! You NEED IT! But there is where the problem lies. To get this, to get this around your waist, to have your name right here.”
James points to the nameplate, the nameplate that reads James Kelloggs.
”You have to do something so impossible, so demanding that Tom Cruise and Albert Einstein combined! Wouldn’t be able to solve this problem and that is, defeat me for this belt. You can look to the skies for answers! Pick up the good book and read it cover to cover, frontwards and backwards twice and you still won’t find the answers. Go to confession and lay your sins out on a table and say 1900 hail mary’s!”
Kelloggs shakes his head no….
”You wouldn’t find the answers. You can’t find the strength. Superman can’t help you for he is powerless and once you step inside those ropes and see me, your life as you know is over with, you are the sheep lead to slaughter for there is no way and I mean NO WAY you can ever defeat the Bad Ass One! To figure it out, to solve the puzzle, it will drive you mad! COMPLETELY MAD! Just look at my opponent this week. Tyler Raptor.”
James motions that he is crazy.
”He thought so hard, the gears in his tiny little head were running so fast that he snapped and suddenly he thought he was standing up for me! He was going to save me. Can you get a load of that guy? He was going to take this belt right here and fight against the injustices of the world, the injustices that have been inflicted on me…..buddy. Pal. Take a look around! I’m doing just fine. I’m doing…”
James looks out to the balcony and his two guest for the night, they are starting to make out with each other. He nods and smirks.
”Just fine for myself. I especially don’t need some asshat like yourself standing up for me. I more than stand on my own two feet. Just to quote another white guy here for a second, “If there is a problem, yo, I’ll solve it.” and you Raptor will join all of the dinosaurs on “Ice ice baby” disappearing with Ron Hamilton into the land of the lost, the land of the forgotten, the land of the never was going to happen. The land of misfit toys for all I care. The odds of you beating me tomorrow night are nil at best, those are your odds on a good day, with the wind at your back and the sun in my eyes. There is a reason why I am the champ, the only damn champ that matters in the UWL and it’s because I’m just that damn good. I’m….golden!”
Kelloggs runs his hand over the face of the title, like he’s rubbing your face in it that he has the belt and you don’t. Little bastard….
”And there isn’t a damn thing that is ever going to change that! For once and for all, tomorrow night at Only the Strong Survive, I! The Bad Ass James Kelloggs, will kick some ass, will cash a big fat ass check and…..and will get some ass on top of all of that and Tyler, that is a whole lotta of ass going on tomorrow night and it will happen because I am the Bad Ass James Kelloggs. Champion of Champions. Your beloved, worshipped and idolized Prestigious Prestige World Champion! And that kiddies, you can take to the bank because here in Vegas, the house always win.”
Out on the balcony, it’s getting pretty heated out there. The towels are on the ground now.
”Now if you excuse me. There is some….winning...going on out there that I need to join so you can see yourself out bitch!”
James Kelloggs turns and starts to make his way towards the balcony and he loses his towel in the process…….