Post by Steve Sinclair on Dec 24, 2013 16:22:26 GMT
Apr 28 2007
Do you remember as a kid watching Sesame Street perhaps being scared to shit at the sight of Snuffleupagus? Maybe you will remember a game that they used to have on Sesame Street, called what doesn’t belong. They would have three cans of soup and bottle rocket and ask you what doesn’t belong? Well that’s how Double J Joe Jones feels this week when he saw the line up posted on the BLPW Website.
The lap top sits on the counter top with the line up posted for Epic at the Alamodome in Texas. Joe stands a few feet away form the counter top taking a few sips from his coffee.
“huh.”
Joe rubs his eyes and the ridge of his nose. He “holds” his eyes for a few seconds before blinking a few times and looking at the screen again.
“Fucking JC.”
Joe turns around and places his coffee mug on the table next to US and Tag Team titles. He picks up his cell phone and flips it open. With unlimited free texting Joe sends a text message to the blob known as Barry Burton. Joe sends send and flips the phone closed. He places the phone back on the table and strips off his shirt as he walks out of the kitchen and across his back is a nasty bruise.
Several hours later……
Barry Burton finds himself somewhere in San Antonio where the city is a full a buzz about the Spurs being in the playoffs. Every where Barry looks he see “Go Spurs!” and Duncan and Parker jerseys, even at the Alamo. The pride of Texas is where Barry is set to meet Double J Joe Jones. So far there hasn’t been any sight of Double J and Barry is beginning to wonder if he’ll show up. Just as Barry was about to call it a day he spots Double J walking up to the Alamo wearing a AI jersey. Joe looks a little drunk as he stumbles up the steps towards Barry.
BB “Joe! What the hell are you doing? Have you gone mad?”
JJ “Why Barry! Just the opposite!” Joe says with a smile on his face. He’s very “Happy” right now as he puts his hand on Barry’s shoulder. “I told you that you would get a excusive here today.”
BB “What? They you can single handily piss off a whole city?”
JJ “Funny you mention the word piss.” Joe says as he laughs. Barry grabs a hold of Joe.
BB “I don’t know what you have in mind but you need to get that jersey off and go and sober up! You have a huge match coming up at Epic.”
JJ “Speaking of that match….I’m glad you brought that up Barry. Look….we have to talk about that match, the match in which there’s five people in the ring who all share one common goal and that is beating me for my US and or Tag Team title. Barry…..honesty now…..do I look like a idiot?”
BB “Right now! Yes!”
JJ “Okay good. We agree on something but I have a plan Barry.”
Joe can’t stand still and Barry is almost holding him up.
BB “What plan is that?”
JJ “I’m going to not show up for Epic.”
BB “Now I know you’re nuts! JC will fire you on the spot if you no show.”
JJ “See Barry…..that’s where you’re wrong.”
Just then some Spurs fan walk by and Joe has to get a few insults in.
JJ “HEY! Why don’t you two rout for a real team! A team full of real players! Not some over the hill center and his gay boy point guard. Fucking fags!”
Fan #1 “What did you say?”
JJ “You heard me! The Spurs SUCK!!!!”
Barry steps between him and the fan. “He’s drunk! He didn’t mean it. He’s actually a Hawks fan so you know, this time of the year is always rough for him.”
Fan # 1 “Tell your friend to watch his mouth or we’ll shut it for him.”
JJ “That’s what’s your mom said last night!”
Fan # ! “Why you son of a …”
Barry starts to push the fan back. “Just go man! Let it go! Can’t you see he’s wasted? What good will it do to kick his ass?”
The fan points at Joe and his buddy starts to pull him back. Joe blows him a kiss. Barry spins and gets right in Joe’s face!
BB “Are yo trying to start a riot!”
JJ “Yup!”
BB “Why?”
JJ “Because Barry….if I get locked up, then I have a legal reason to throw in JC’s face and my so called tag team partners and they moron’s we’re facing can just go ahead and kiss my ass because I’m not walking into some trap set by JC! Fuck that shit! I’m a fucking icon in this sport and JC isn’t going to punk me out man! Now if you excuse me, I need to take a piss.”
BB “What? Where! There isn’t a bathroom here! Holy shit!”
JJ “Hey man! It got Ozzy booted out of Texas for ten years man!”
Joe whips it out and starts to take a leak on the Alamo just as the cops roll up.
BB “You crazy fuck!”
Joe is tackled down to the ground as he stands in front of the Alamo and relives himself.
FTB……………………………
Do you remember as a kid watching Sesame Street perhaps being scared to shit at the sight of Snuffleupagus? Maybe you will remember a game that they used to have on Sesame Street, called what doesn’t belong. They would have three cans of soup and bottle rocket and ask you what doesn’t belong? Well that’s how Double J Joe Jones feels this week when he saw the line up posted on the BLPW Website.
The lap top sits on the counter top with the line up posted for Epic at the Alamodome in Texas. Joe stands a few feet away form the counter top taking a few sips from his coffee.
“huh.”
Joe rubs his eyes and the ridge of his nose. He “holds” his eyes for a few seconds before blinking a few times and looking at the screen again.
“Fucking JC.”
Joe turns around and places his coffee mug on the table next to US and Tag Team titles. He picks up his cell phone and flips it open. With unlimited free texting Joe sends a text message to the blob known as Barry Burton. Joe sends send and flips the phone closed. He places the phone back on the table and strips off his shirt as he walks out of the kitchen and across his back is a nasty bruise.
Several hours later……
Barry Burton finds himself somewhere in San Antonio where the city is a full a buzz about the Spurs being in the playoffs. Every where Barry looks he see “Go Spurs!” and Duncan and Parker jerseys, even at the Alamo. The pride of Texas is where Barry is set to meet Double J Joe Jones. So far there hasn’t been any sight of Double J and Barry is beginning to wonder if he’ll show up. Just as Barry was about to call it a day he spots Double J walking up to the Alamo wearing a AI jersey. Joe looks a little drunk as he stumbles up the steps towards Barry.
BB “Joe! What the hell are you doing? Have you gone mad?”
JJ “Why Barry! Just the opposite!” Joe says with a smile on his face. He’s very “Happy” right now as he puts his hand on Barry’s shoulder. “I told you that you would get a excusive here today.”
BB “What? They you can single handily piss off a whole city?”
JJ “Funny you mention the word piss.” Joe says as he laughs. Barry grabs a hold of Joe.
BB “I don’t know what you have in mind but you need to get that jersey off and go and sober up! You have a huge match coming up at Epic.”
JJ “Speaking of that match….I’m glad you brought that up Barry. Look….we have to talk about that match, the match in which there’s five people in the ring who all share one common goal and that is beating me for my US and or Tag Team title. Barry…..honesty now…..do I look like a idiot?”
BB “Right now! Yes!”
JJ “Okay good. We agree on something but I have a plan Barry.”
Joe can’t stand still and Barry is almost holding him up.
BB “What plan is that?”
JJ “I’m going to not show up for Epic.”
BB “Now I know you’re nuts! JC will fire you on the spot if you no show.”
JJ “See Barry…..that’s where you’re wrong.”
Just then some Spurs fan walk by and Joe has to get a few insults in.
JJ “HEY! Why don’t you two rout for a real team! A team full of real players! Not some over the hill center and his gay boy point guard. Fucking fags!”
Fan #1 “What did you say?”
JJ “You heard me! The Spurs SUCK!!!!”
Barry steps between him and the fan. “He’s drunk! He didn’t mean it. He’s actually a Hawks fan so you know, this time of the year is always rough for him.”
Fan # 1 “Tell your friend to watch his mouth or we’ll shut it for him.”
JJ “That’s what’s your mom said last night!”
Fan # ! “Why you son of a …”
Barry starts to push the fan back. “Just go man! Let it go! Can’t you see he’s wasted? What good will it do to kick his ass?”
The fan points at Joe and his buddy starts to pull him back. Joe blows him a kiss. Barry spins and gets right in Joe’s face!
BB “Are yo trying to start a riot!”
JJ “Yup!”
BB “Why?”
JJ “Because Barry….if I get locked up, then I have a legal reason to throw in JC’s face and my so called tag team partners and they moron’s we’re facing can just go ahead and kiss my ass because I’m not walking into some trap set by JC! Fuck that shit! I’m a fucking icon in this sport and JC isn’t going to punk me out man! Now if you excuse me, I need to take a piss.”
BB “What? Where! There isn’t a bathroom here! Holy shit!”
JJ “Hey man! It got Ozzy booted out of Texas for ten years man!”
Joe whips it out and starts to take a leak on the Alamo just as the cops roll up.
BB “You crazy fuck!”
Joe is tackled down to the ground as he stands in front of the Alamo and relives himself.
FTB……………………………